Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Ra.None??? Tan tana... the promised review!

Blogdosts, let's get a few things straight - the movie has made money. Does personal opinion really matter?? Naaaaaaah!
*************
This appeared in Bombay Times today....

What were you thinking, SRK?

When a hotelier scouts around for a new property, he keeps just one mantra in mind : Location.Location. Location. This is the only formula that works in that line of business. Similarly, when a film maker decides to make a movie, the only mantra worth following is : Script.Script.Script. After sitting through half of Ra.One ( I rarely leave a movie mid-way, but this one propelled me out of the multiplex at intermission), I was totally perplexed! SRK is one of the smartest, most hard working human beings in the film industry. How did he go so wrong? Could he not see the obvious flaws? Judge the mood of his audience? Tweak and fix all that was cringe- making and deeply embarrassing about his magnum opus? And let’s not get into the numbers game here and talk about how much it has raked in and how much more will be made once the hisaab kitaab is completed? There was much, much more riding on this film, than just box office collections. SRK knows that, too. His singular lack of judgment in backing such a mish mash of a movie makes fans gnash their teeth in frustration and ask what has happened to their superhero?Not only is the whole nerdy South Indian ‘Appa’ angle completely off ( come on, how many South Indian men shovel noodles with dahi into their mouths and keep repeating ‘Aiyooo’ in a fake accent?). But so was the Punjabi Kudi Kareena as a gaali researcher North Indian biwi! Bebo as the mother of a precocious pre-teen ‘Baba’? No way! The opening scene was so gauche and amateurish one almost expected a ‘Mogambo Khush Hua’, dialogue during what was meant to be a hi-tech, state of the art presentation in London. And why was SRK the Southie scientist wearing a gollywog wig and make up? How insulting! As for that dreadful sexist scene of SRK looking for keys buried inside a white woman’s cleavage , really! Gross.
The little boy (Amaan Verma) playing Prateek should immediately sign up for a range of hair products, with that glossy mop. And SRK should go off on a relaxing vacation. He has really earned it. Never has a movie star flogged himself this hard to promote a film. If only he had invested half that energy rewriting the awful script, the movie could have been salvaged somewhat. There were so many unconnected parallel tracks going on, it was confusing and annoying…. like watching half-a-dozen movies clumsily spliced together by an editor high on something very potent. Such a pity, given the potentially sound basic premise ( a father dying to be his son’s hero). But even that was ruined by the ridiculous mugging scene. Besides, if there is a moral in all this it is that special effects are no substitutes for a story. Ra.One is an example of how to blow up several millions – literally speaking – on so little.If kids are the target audience, wouldn’t they prefer to buy the latest video game with a more convincing plot? Poor SRK.It’s all about timing. So much déjà vu is bad for business.Had audiences not watched Rajnikanth as Chitti in ‘Robot’ (superb and similar special effects, plus an emotional track) and related to that character, Ra.One may not have received such a drubbing. Unfortunately, even young fans ended up saying, “Been there.Done that.”

30 comments:

venkat gaddam said...

Shobhaa, I love how your so blunt and frank. It's so true. He made money--His ultimate motive of making the film in the first place. The movie sucked, of course!

TheBluntBlogger said...

Exactly how I like it. The disrespect of my time...and this was a review served...well...Bold.

Hugs for this one :-) and thank you for keeping the promise....

Pooja Rathore said...

i have not seen RA-one ,i did not like the trailor much but srk seemed very confident,but since the release i have not heard about the movie from anyone meaning -the movie has not worked.
your review -well written,makes sense.good script is a must!

Life Unordinary said...

Thank you for the review. I have enjoyed the soundtrack but it seems like that's all that there is to enjoy.

Appu said...

The movie has made money is a personal opinion?

kakaka said...

he wants to show that south Indians have kinky hair like Africans. quite frankly if Africans were wealthy even that would become popular.

all of us would start kinking our hair instead of straightening it.

SRK for all purpose may be racist and then the guy makes a big deal about how he gets mistreated at airports and whites are into racial profiling etc.

There is reason i choose not to react when Indians complain of racism abroad, aren't we the most racist of all anyway.

glimpses said...

bang on - this was the exact reaction of my family when we watched the movie last week...

Vie said...

Why did'ntg he pay a Hollywood scriptwriter and then hire an A class translator and "Indian emotion"touch-up writer. He would have made gazillions more money

Arjun said...

Well the guy has made money already, while you ppl try adding 2 and 2. :)
You all have to realize that the film was a first of a kind in Bollywood, with expensive animation, 3D visuals, and all thing high on technology that made it a heavy budget film. Commenting that the storyline was lousy, or that the dialogues were ineffective is all meaningless analysis. The Display Unit companies are preparing you for the next wave of content viewing, which is all-3D. Currently there is very less programming content in 3D, and so consumers will find it hard to graduate to 3D TVs from their current HD TVs or non-HD TVs. SRK need not worry about the success or failure of the movie content itself so far as he's well supported by the industry to push a certain product or concept into the market to increase mass appeal.
SRK, as a brand is going nowhere. It'll probably be faced with increasing competition with new artists, but he's reached the kind of dizzying levels that should keep him busy all his working life.

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Website and Printing Solutions said...

The movie is one time watch.
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venkat gaddam said...

Read my full Ra.One review here: http://gaddamvenks.blogspot.com/2011/11/raone-review-quite-bad-one.html

Radhika Gupta said...

I am big SRK fan but sadly even i completely agree with you... the movie was not at all upto the mark...

Vrinda said...

The movie mainly concentrates on kids (boys) between age 8-14. It is a onetime watch.

Sujata said...

Making fun of Tamilians is a very wrong thing to do. Ra-One must have been ghost directed / ghost scripted by Farah khan I suppose.

yumn said...

so much 4 the hype!!!!

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Latha said...

I don't think Shah Rukh is a racist. SRK was approached by Mani Ratnam for his Ravan & Shankar for his Robot as their first choice. Ash was the heroine in both the films. You know srk never worked with Ash after Devdas. Both were on top those days. Even their b'days are close (Nov 1 & 2). Hemamalini & Bachchan had similar problems. They never worked together after Satte pe Satta for many years. Footage problems ! They both were toppers those days. Their b'days too are close (Oct 11 & 16). But they started working together after they became seniors. Similarly srk & Ash might act together as the parents to the kids of the present day stars once they become seniors, who knows ? Ra one I think is srk's expression of his yearning of not having been part of Mani & Shankar's films which would've been his dream fulfilled.
I have not seen Ra one. But srk has worked very hard for it. He has put his heart & soul not to speak of bags of money in it. I wish him all the best.

Sparkling said...

'Nuff said and so well said!

P.S: Am still chewing on my panadols!

Jogeshwar said...

People are sharing such messages on FB about the movie

How Sharukh khan makes profit from Ra.one....

Ticket seller :: Boss, no one is buying Ra.One's movie tickets. V will be ruined.

Theatre owner :: Give it for free. Once they enter, close the doors & start selling EXIT tickets for Rs 500. :D

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*Aham* said...

feel poor shahrukh should take it thada.. he has made all the paisaas that he needs.. has a great fan following... he shouldnt really experiment now. he should stick to kjo and make heart-heavy-teary films. it really works with him.

i dont understand why cant he age very gracefully.. there is an "attempt" to look young.. which is obvious. with full marks to his energy and enthusiasm, and his candid talks... i still feel he is not made for such flicks... "triplet Maata" or the "closet woh" should be his safest bet.

and frankly, his new saut to "closet woh".. (read Ramphal)is not a prudent date.

ohh! boob watching is the Favorite national sport. but that doesnt mean these straight men look any further than fantasy...

abhichhh... some time back my friend -
a married man called up to ask what is a clit.
i asked, "why?"
... he told me "someone told me "dont treat me like a clit"...
i asked " what do you think it is... by the way... its called Clitoris"
he replied "is it a planet or something like that"

i replied "yes, for some men it is so"





and there is the "actual" transcript of our conversation, im still laughing. of course i did give him "gupt gyaan" he requires, but not before i had a hearty laugh.

NAT said...

A good movie for kids. Let them enjoy...

pradeep kumar said...

the song chammak challo is good. The movie looks like video game.
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Chaithrika said...

Oh... it was not a bad movie at all.
I am a South Indian and I eat curd with each and everything, rice, dosa, idly, sevai, chapati, poori... and even hundreds of my relatives do it.
It is not at all odd for me to see SRK eating noodles with curd.

Well, the review seems like it is intended to prove every thing associated with the movie wrong. There was definitely no point to walk out of the theatre in the middle of the movie unless some one has decided to do so before entering the theatre.

I love playing games in computer and i loved the concept of a game character coming out. If we can accept a hero hitting 10 villains in one shot, or running faster than a chasing 4 wheeler, why not a game character coming out of computer?

Well, surely some jokes were not good, some questions unanswered (like why owner of the company serious about the destroyed lab?), the movie cannot be considered bad.

Since there are so many readers for the blog, i feel personal opinion should not be generalized as it is misguiding the readers in this case.

numerounity said...

Aiyyo..the costliest ever mid-life crisis.

Heard Rahul [baba] Gandhi is on other condolence trip. He is visiting family of all those who watched Gone oops G.One!

What was SRK thinking? or was he too mad in love in Ms chopra to notice it? Hee hee...Though I loved the chammak chhalo track in tamil in youtube n gorgeous looking Kareena but couldn't sustain it after 20 minutes!

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