Friday, July 30, 2010

Once Upon a Time... Column 8

Voila!! 'The Sacred Cow' in all her glory!!!
Sorry, I didn't get to click Sidharth since I was in a ridiculous rush. But I have asked him to send website details. Shall share once I have them.



Masala ‘Dossa’ in Thane jail….

We’ve all heard about a dog’s life…. but if you ask me, a Don’s life is far superior. Especially if you happen to be lavishly housed in one of Mumbai’s more high profile jails. Getting free board and lodging, (with several attractive perks, like booze and biryani thrown in), doesn’t sound like a punishment to me – there are several deprived people in India who’d kill for such a privilege – literally . Amusingly enough,even jails have their specific branding and positioning! Arthur Road jail ( where, Kasab, one of the most wanted men in the world hangs out), is the best address in town and can be compared to Alibag. Every upmarket, upwardly mobile conman wants to live there. Image ka sawaal hai, bhai! This is where elite prisoners like Abu Salem and Mustafa Dossa relax and conduct their business. This is also where things can get really, really rough. Like it happened last week. Salem was attacked by a sharpened spoon ( just like they show in gangster films), and has since been moved to the far more down market Taloja jail in New Mumbai. Dossa has also had to relocate and is now lording it over inside the Thane jail. These moves must seriously damage the reputation of the two superdons, and impact their designer lifestyle. What a comedown for guys who are used to all possible luxuries while serving out their sentences. Reportedly, Salem’s cell is papered over with enticing pin-ups, and his mobile phone is loaded with juicy images of assorted , semi-nude babes. His beauty routine involving various imported face products, is well taken of, as well. And Monica Bedi’s ex- boy friend makes sure he looks good, even if the going is bad. Dossa’s priorities are slightly different. He plays the power game by throwing money around. Their concerns involve supremacy issues, and both prisoners rightly believe it’s all about one-upmanship. Since Dossa is looked after by the elite D-Gang, he obviously has superior resources. Salem, apparently , is finding it hard to compete. Reminds one of socialite turf wars in Mumbai. One socialite has more oomph but less lolly. Another, all the lolly in the world, but zilch sex appeal. So far, the knives have been out, but not sharpened spoons! But yes, spoons ( or chamchas) do play a key role in establishing social superiority, especially in media battles.
Amusing that in the pecking order of the city, there isn’t that much of a difference between the fierce in- fighting that pits socialite against socialite, don against don. Mumbai is like that only….musclepower rules. And there is nothing sexier than going for each other’s throat in public. Criminals and socialites share the same dream after all – they both want absolute control over the city of Gold.
Ah well…was it always this way, one wonders.
I am ready to rewind – are you??

17 comments:

Appu said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Appu said...

in-short:
Watt & Vaat
Re.: rewind
Column 9?
abhi rehne do bhai
movie hit hai
***1/2 - Correct?

sidhu said...

i am ready! funny that u compared socialites to gangsters.thank God u can be even more worse!

sidhu said...

is your daughter arundhati on twitter?

sidhu said...

whats this? five hours have passed since shobhaa's latest post and there are no comments! this is directly related to the subject of the blog,definitely.shobhaa dear,make sure next blog is as spicy and controversial as possible! not for comments; but to entertain your readers.

krunal said...

yeah, that's the way it's always been like, not just in mumbai but every magacity of the world. you can't imagine a world without a pecking order. it's impossible.

Divya Virmani said...

Nicely written but you might wana be a little careful next time...

and now I'm craving for Masala Dossa... :P

ameya said...

nice !
verrrrry nice !

Shwetha said...

Its a *beautiful* painting, the serenity in her gentle face calls out to you and I love the subdued gold embellishing around her. No wonder you fell in love with the work of art! Look forward browsing through the artist's website when he emails back

Thanks for sharing

Shwetha

Jyostna said...

Ahh..Holy Cowwwwww..such a nice painting, esp the gold color is damn gud. Thnx for sharing.
n its true tht if this scenario continues..every criminal will dream of Arthur Rd jail

Radhika Gupta said...

nice painting...i liked the background quite a lot...
n ur article shows how the underworld people control the administration and break rules openly...but then...when were the rules applicable to them!!

sourav said...

Interesting. can inspire bhandarkar to make Jail 2?

Sidhusaaheb said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Sidhusaaheb said...

"there are several deprived people in India who’d kill for such a privilege – literally"

I couldn't agree more.

:)

maroon-beret said...

I started reading your columns in "The Week" during my teenage years .. now was excited to find your blog online !!

Keep penning !!

shereez said...

This is regarding ure article about mustafa dossa ...
Firstly he is not facing a sentence
He is an undertrial ...
And whatever facilities he is given are by the court
So please get ure facts right before posting anything

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