I swear this is it!! No matter what happens! Ayesha can opt for a sex change, Sania and Shoaib can elope in order to escape this tamasha, Sania can fuel rumours she is preggers. Or an ex-boyfriend of Ms. Mirza can emerge from the woodwork bellowing, " Yeh shaadi nahi ho sakti !" But I am done!The story has been flogged to death and there is nothing more left to peddle. Even the Thackerays have pulled out. Yup. It is that dead and dull.
Khair, we can keep our 'Mubarak ho' on hold for now.
Obama is officially Black. Tiger Woods remains in the dog house. And the IPL bores me.
For whatever it is worth.... read on....
My fiction writer’s mind is in overdrive. This is one story that cannot be topped by even the most enthu Bollywood script writer . It has enough masala in every twist to keep the masses ( and asses) salivating for more. Nothing gets readers and viewers as fired up as a salacious story involving young, good looking, affluent celebs. And if one of them ( guess who?) has loads of attitude to boot – wow!! The media has got itself a whopper of a winner. Sania-Shoaib ka gadbad ghotala has been front page news for days. And it is also the number one breaking news story on every channel, never mind the horrific rape of an MBA graduate in Pune. At the time of writing everyone including his uncle, aunt and neighbour , had been interviewed - from Lahore, Sialkot, Hyderabad and beyond. There were Sania sightings on the balcony of her Hyderabad villa. And we had been treated to theories galore, culled from available information. But despite the bombardment on all fronts, one thing is still unclear – who is the liar in this drama?? And above all – who is Ayesha?
I may be in a minority of one on this, but I am pretty sure Shoaib was misled at some point. The girl he thought he was marrying ( and he definitely did marry someone in this rather bizarre episode) may not have been the girl he thought he was in love with. Chances are, he met two girls ( Ayesha and Maha), fell for one, but accidentally married the other! Sounds absurd, but given the craziness of this entire set up, it is also possible. Somehow, and this may sound cruel, I cannot see a handsome, ambitious Pakistani cricketer falling for the rather plain looking, overweight girl - the same one we have been watching on television. These guys have the world’s best looking females throwing themselves at them. Why would he settle for someone like her, that too when his career was rocking, unless there was a catch in the story? I listened with interest as his brother- in- law Imran from Lahore, patiently and politely took viewers through the rigmarole, while Ayesha’s mother wept hysterically on Arnab’s show. Imran maintained that the girl who wooed Shoaib over the phone and internet, was in fact, not the same girl he’d flipped for in person, but her clever friend. He also said that the two or three times Shoaib went to Hyderabad to meet his bride-to-be, she was never there! And the family would come up with some lame excuse ( she had to leave town suddenly, she was in hospital undergoing surgery, she was in some other city on work) and distract Shoaib. Assuming Shoaib really and truly fell for this ruse, he must be one hell of a dumbo. And if he is such a dumbo, why is Sania the Smartie, marrying such a guy? Can’t be for the money ( she has much more), can’t be for the fame ( she is way ahead in the fame stakes), then why? Aaha – she has fallen for his boyish, good looks and rakish sex appeal. That’s it! She’s a woman in love, and as we all know, a woman in love will do anything… defend a scoundrel, stand by the fellow and agree to marry him, even though he may be married to someone else.
The date’s set. The wedding is on. Unless something changes between now and the 15th of April. Something significant and dramatic. Unless the real Ayesha turns up. The one Shoaib fell in love with. In which case, what will his current wife do??? Oh my God. This is getting a bit too complicated even for me. Must be the heat. I think I’ll go cool off and watch some cricket – oops, wrong game. Too many maidens getting bowled over.