Thursday, June 16, 2011

Salman Khan and Baba Ramdev:Both are 'Ready'!

This appeared in Sunday Times...


What do Salman Khan and Baba Ramdev have in common…?


Let me put it bluntly - Salman Khan and Baba Ramdev have hot bods . Very hot. They are poster boys for Ultimate Fitness. In fact, it’s all about the bod. Both men know as much. Both have made their reputations flaunting their impressive physical assets. And both go happily shirtless, displaying great panache along with their sculpted silhouettes.Think about it…. Baba Ramdev shot to fame much after Salman ( ‘The Bod’) Khan. The ‘Rockstar of Yoga,’ as Ramdev has been famously called, used the television platform to promote himself and become a household name. As a Yoga teacher, he made more Indians aware of physical fitness than any expert has succeeded in doing so far. Salman Khan made it in the movies on a mega scale after he decided to bare his torso and flex his biceps. Salman has been rightfully credited with generating impressive revenues for desi akhadas and gyms, to which countless men rushed wishing to emulate the actor and acquire a drool worthy physique. For the Khan, his daily workout is non-negotiable. It’s his religion. Ditto for Ramdev. Now that Salman is officially the most successful Khan in Bollywood, producers who want to work with him are expected to provide the star with a full fledged gym on the sets. Baba Ramdev doesn’t need a gym – he is the gym! Despite their different approach to acquiring the body beautiful, both these guys know it is their dedication to their respective physiques that has millions of ardent devotees panting. Salman shares his fitness mantras generously with friends, foes and fans. Baba Ramdev shares his with strangers – anybody who cares to switch on his channel or join his classes . Salman gives away his trade secrets for free. Baba Ramdev charges a bomb (Rs.10,000 per session insist his detractors). So far, Salman has not starved for a cause.Nor has he joined politics( he’s leaving that option to the other Khans!). Even though Salman is the top earner in his line of business, he doesn’t own a private jet yet ( his fans send him theirs!). Nor do Delhi politicos come running to the airport to meet him. But several Sheikhs in the Middle East do just that each time he lands up to promote a film. Salman travels with an entourage that includes Shera, his faithful bodyguard. Baba Ramdev’s entourage is much bigger and he has several bodyguards. Salman has a sense of humour. Baba Ramdev, none! Salman frequently laughs at himself. Baba Ramdev has detractors laughing at him. Significantly, both men are single. But only one of them is ready to mingle ( guess who?). In terms of mass hysteria, it’s hard to say which one generates more passion. If Ramdev’s followers were overflowing at the Ram Lila grounds last week, Salman’s besotted fans can effortlessly fill a couple of stadiums – no occasion required. Talking of ‘fan-love’ – Salman’s fans happen to be so hard core, they are ready to slaughter anybody who dares to criticize their beloved Sallu Bhai or Bhai Jaan. Baba Ramdev’s bhakts are equally fanatical. It’s called chela pyaar. Both men are acutely aware of their formidable star power… they have it, flaunt it, and exploit it. Salman peddles his Being Human line of products for charity. Ramdev sells assorted ‘cures’ for everything from cancer to baldness, for himself.
Charisma is hard – very hard - to deconstruct. In the case of these two men, one can see what turns movie audiences on each time Salman shakes his butt and goes, ‘Chak Dhinachak..” Ramdev turns into a pretzel each morning and breathes heavily as followers gasp and swoon. Devotees find all of this unbeatably sexy. Crowd mentality is hard to predict, but it’s safe to say if anybody can mobilize impressive mobs and throngs without really trying, it’s these two guys. If anybody can get thousands to leave home, forget khaana peena temporarily and join a movement – you- know-who can pull it off. So, what is it about such people that drives other people nuts? Nuts enough to abandon good sense, logic, rational behaviour… sanity, for Gods’sake? No idea, Sirji! Both are entertainers par excellence. They understand the medium and know that that is the message. Both perform effortlessly 24x7 – that’s show business. Both manipulate. Both make money. The big difference is that one of them wants to lead India out of the dark ages and banish black money. The other makes a living in an industry where the colour of money is unimportant. Both insist there is no political agenda behind their public posturing. Maybe we should give them the benefit of the doubt. It would be amusing to see them sharing the same platform some day… visualize the scene : two shirtless superstars , one breathless, the other breathing through one nostril, both flexing muscles ( one, politically, the other literally) and the crowds going crazy!
Wow! Yeh mera India – are you ‘Ready’ for it??
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Good to be home. Nothing like comfort food to welcome home weary travellers... though I have to confess I could have happily spent three more days in Barcelona. Paella and Picasso - what is there not to love about this incredible city?

14 comments:

Sadiya Merchant said...

lol
ramdev = sexy *pukes*

चंद्रमौलेश्वर प्रसाद said...

`What do Salman Khan and Baba Ramdev have in common…?'
Both are averse to Shirt :)

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goodluck said...

Both have great bodies? but zero brains.Both show how aam admi has developed karela tastes. If Ready can become Bluster, Baba can become President of USA. Next there will be Bloody to beat Ready. One is fast, other loves fasting. One loves ramlila grounds. the other loves krishnaleela.

goodluck said...

SRK will come back and swallow salman, the 2 day wonder.
What do u think of our resident Buddha in BHTB who is trying hard borrowing clothes, glasses from local rowdies?
What do u think of the perfect khan making imperfect noises about awards?

Pooja Rathore said...

good to know you r back.nice comparison b/w salman and the baba.
read (opinion) by EX chief justice krisna iyer on Ramdev baba (times of india jun 14th 2011).He has lashed out at the baba!

Divya Virmani said...

This was a good read. Great comparison between Salman and Ramdev. I have seen the Ramdev tamasha and Salman's Ready. Sallu knows exactly how to lure public towards his movies. He's the Guru of it post Dabangg success. Whereas Ramdev is just trying his best to get into politics. The followers are aam junta who's demanding to fight for the simplest right: freedom of speech, freedom to live! You see, Mrs. De, people like you are minutely affected by such causes. You roll in luxurious cars, go on a world tour, live in a perfect place equipped with all basic and extraordinary necessities...however, aam junta doesn't have all that! People die to earn one roti for a day. So if Ramdev and/or Anna Hazare stepped to help the aam junta. No harm at all! Let's see how things will roll? I can only hope for the best because I too belong to that aam junta. And you, can only sit in your comfy chair and babble about your trips and bullshit about the common man! Seriously, if you can't do much then don't bullshit much!
http://divyavirmani.blogspot.com/2011/06/india-india-india.html

Harman said...

comparison was hilarious...
jai ho!

Sudhir Kekre said...

An open Letter to the PM :

So whenever I call young Tony and ask him what is he doing, he says in his sing song voice, “ Kuch Nahi”. That immediately reminds me of you.

http://hamarichaupal.blogspot.com/2011/06/open-letter-to-pm.html

Sejal said...

Well said Divya! Only a common man will defend this article that she has written against people who actually fight against corruption.

Priya said...

cool comparision :)....

*Aham* said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
*Aham* said...

come on. baba is better. i love him. in fact many of my gay friends love him. he doesnt need to exercise. he himself is the exercise. i love him. money and honey he has both. he is rational and sane. he is therefore the flagbearer of moral standards and ensures that they are held in high esteem. imagine, if it was not him, and his fantastic statements - we would have been so immoral.

who else can live a sacrosanct straight life and yet bend it like beckham. he is a saint because, he mints money but is no aiyaash... he plays poker and doesnt poke her.

What else can be said about the mahaprabhu...



as for salman. the god of physique has become more bulky than the elephants in jijamata udyaan. soon his ardh nanga shareer would have no takers. Though there are still many who are his jism ka poojaari and poojaarans... i feel his USP is his stupidness, he is the new govinda.

Tintu said...

If baba is a dhongi baba, then for last 7 years ,what was the govt doing? Why they send 4 ministers? Why they called baba for talks? Why they allowed to organize the yoga camp as the govt claims? could dhong has given him this worldwide popularity? And if govt was knowingly doing these all silly things means the govt is the biggest dhongi.And for this they must apologize.The govt should except that they cheat the public and for this reason they must quit.