Making Hay( wood) when the sun shines....

Disgraceful!! Call that a security lapse?? I call it collusion. How could American Kenneth Haywood waltz out of the country so easily, even though there was a look out notice against his name? He managed to get out of India from New Delhi's International Airport, even while he was being questioned for his involvement in the Ahemedabad blasts. His computers may have have been left behind with the ATS, but he has flown the coop along with his family members. It goes to show just how lax our systems are - suspects, terrorists, criminals and drug dealers are free to come and go at will, because we are not efficient \ serious \ honest enough. Our cops manage to bungle nearly every major case. Haywood has claimed a top cop asked him for a bribe to 'fix' his papers. I would believe it. And a bribe must have been paid for him to slip away so effortlessly. I am equally certain a deal was struck at the highest levels with American agencies and our diplomats agreeing to a certain modus operandi. Haywood's innocence or complicity in such a serious and sensitive case, is not the issue. That he cocked a snook at Indian laws and fled,is far more worrying.This will effectively put an end to the terror trail. Haywood will be forgotten by the media. Till another set of blasts rips our country apart.I agree all Muslims are not terrorists, but most terrorists are Muslims. That's the uncomfortable truth.
What is happening in Jammu & Kashmir ought to serve as a wake up call - will it?Corrupt politicians are playing a dangerous game, playing into the hands of traitors and separatists.If we don't act now, one more battlefield will witness a bloodbath.
Haywood was no victim.By letting him escape, we have compromised our national security .Again. Will those responsible be made accountable? Not a chance...

Kissing coach required

'Bachna...' was just so much fun!Worth the pricey ticket and popcorn. A far better entertainer than that silly Kinng flick. The sardars were more authentic, too. Especially the dishy Kunal Kapoor playing a love lorn husband.Nangu Kapoor did not have to display his butt in this movie, but had the kudis swooning nevertheless.He is a serious cutie, this Kapoor boy, with his droopy, crossed eyes, sad sack expression, rosebud mouth, obvious hair weave, lantern jaw and fixed up teeth. Slouchy, hip sex appeal a la Hollywood heroes. As an actor there is an effortlessness and ease about his performance ( last seen in 'Rangeela' - Aamir's most consummate role to date) that reaches right out of that silver screen and aims for the audience's heart. Everyone loves this goofy guy - even other guys. He is non-threatening and adorable. Only problem? He looks a richie rich kid every inch of the way.Big plus in a breezy movie like this one, but may limit his roles in future. The three deviyaan look incredibly awful in the first half. Strange. Did they hire new designers, stylists, make up artists for the post-interval segments? Prakash Padukone is far, far prettier than his daughter Deepika (she can act, but is no looker), Minnisha and Bipasha looked like Ranbir's much older cousins - at least Bipasha looked scrumptious and hot in the Capri sequences. But the Lamba girl was such a wash out. As for the kissing... oof, one would have expected the two real life lovers, Ranbir and Deepika to get it right. But no.... Our actors can't kiss, saala.Kuch coaching-voching ho jaye??The best thing about the movie? Its contemporary tone, lingo and situations.Definitely worth a dekho.Bips is like melting hot chocolate on a cold Alpine night. Or several shots of tequila in a Mexican bar.Entirely and unambiguously delicious. Like her boyfriend John Abraham in the promos of Dostana, Karan Johar's official Gay film.Can't wait to see this one...

Vidya Balan's slip is showing.... again!!

Oh-oh, the Balan girl has done it again!Vidya just can't seem to get it right. This time it's the cover of 'Savvy' which features Vidya in yet another disastrous garment with her bra straps in full view. Does the actress not own a strapless one? Has she never heard of certain basics like not weraing beige lingerie inside a black strappy number? Why doesn't the lassie just hire a stylist in order to avoid frequent and embarrassing fashion faux pas? We were together at a function in Delhi last year, and I found her to be an intelligent, well- mannered, likeable young woman. We didn't discuss fashion, but we did talk of other less mundane things.Vidya is appealingly non-filmi... almost 'normal'.Somehow, she has not been able to transcend her spectacular debut performance in 'Parineeta'. The more she tries to compete with younger sirens and sport sexy western wear, the worse she looks.But the bra shot takes the cake.It is just sooooo careless and clumsy. And on the cover, at that! Tch, tch, Andrea.
On a completely different plane, I am not convinced the Queer Zaadi march was the best idea. The media treated it as a tamasha, with most reports sneering at the campiness of it all. Yes, it is a small beginning. But an appropriate one?? Laxmi, the Hijra is likely to become the Poster Person for the movement, now that Salman Rushdie has made her the focus of his AIDS essay. Good for Laxmi. But what happens to the anonymous Gay looking for nothing more than the right to lead his\her life in peace??
Talking of rights, my old school friend Shabana Azmi has spoken to Karan Thapar about her difficulty in finding a flat in Mumbai because she is a Muslim. While I can understand her pain, I also want her to know I was chased out of Bhendi Bazaar, nearly spat upon, hissed at and told to get lost. Why? Because I was wearing a saree and sporting a bindi. Didn't realise that was a crime these days? It was a nasty experience, particularly since it is an area I have been frequenting over the years and always considered my backyard.I can tell you I am in no hurry to go back there. It has been made abundantly clear that certain communities are no longer welcome. I am equally hurt, bewildered,anguished and disturbed. I thought this was my city, too. All of it. Not just pockets.Shabana and Saif are not isolated victims, or hand picked targets. I want them to know the discrimination goes both ways. And is a sad comment on how polarised we really are.Why go all the way to Jammu & Kashmir? Try walking through Null Bazaar.... if you dare.

Raksha Bandhan. Whose raksha.... what bandhan?

This may sound like sacrilege, but the whole business of rakhee tying has lost its meaning and significance in this day and age. I'm sure a lot of women will agree when I say that men need our protection much more than we need theirs these days! I have never relied on a man to 'protect' me, even as a child. Often, I have found myself coming to the rescue of guys who appear far weaker.... physically and emotionally. Maybe it's time to reverse the ritual and get brothers to tie those fancy threads on the wrists of more capable sisters. Better still, why not make it more democratic? Let it go both ways. Just like the mehendi ceremony at desi weddings these days, which encourages the participation of the bridegroom and his cronies. It is not unusual to see henna-ed paisley patterns on the palms of hirsute male invitees at society weddings..... nobody laughs.
The most meaningless practice of all is the custom of 'adopting' rakhee brothers. I don't really get it. But if it works for you....? Virtual rakhees are equally silly. But in these days of virtual love and more...why not?
My painstakingly written patriotic blog disappeared into cyberspace last night. But, I must wish you all a belated Happy Independence Day regardless. Like I'd written, I was immensely pleased to note that more and more people are proudly flying the tri colour now. This was the mushy mood in which I met one of my all time heroes this morning - our former President, Dr. Abdul Kalam. And he said something wonderful to the assembled students - let the tricolour fly in your heart. He said several more , equally inspiring things to the audience, in a manner so humble, childlike and spontaneous, that he instantly won a lot of hearts. Such a shame he was not given a second term as Prezzie - ironically, due to his growing popularity!! How devilish our politicians are. And how passive are we to allow them to manipulate us with such ease.
Salman, Tussi Great Ho! Imagine HIM, of all people in Bollywood, posing grandly on the cover of BT with the Indian flag , while reminding readers that it's important to adhere to traditional Indian values ! Rich irony. Great timing. Superb p.r. Will that save the film?? Too early to say.But his smirk says it all, anyway.
Did Rajdeep Sardesai have to all but keel over with gratitude thanking Aamir Khan for gracing an Awards' function? It was embarrassing, to say the least. And insulting to the Unsung Heroes being honoured on stage - it was supposed to be their moment, remember? Not Aamir's clever brand extension ...TALKING OF WHICH, this smart Khan has outstripped the others efortlessly. He has been roped in to sell India, by the government. What's the bet he's up for a major national award next year. Bhushan or Vibhushan??Who knows, BUT the Padma is his for sure.Aamir is smart.Very, very smart.He will sweep all the awards this year, and send his little mascot, Darsheen to pick them up.Perfect way to have his cake and eat it too!Aamir Tussi Amazing Ho!

Childline needs you

I have to be upfront - vested interest and all that.This has to do with the recent Supreme Court ruling overturning the judgement of the Mumbai High Court in the Anchorage case , involving two Britons (rearrested) accused of child abuse.CHILDLINE, THAT TOOK UP THE CAUSE OF THE MINOR BOYS 7 YEARS AGO, discovered to everybody's horror that the middle -aged Brits were about to waltz away - acquitted of all charges. This has got to be a really perverse legal call, given the sensitivity of the case and the overwhelming evidence stacked up against the Brit 'do gooders' at the shelter in Colaba. Oh, the vested interest reference is to my direct involvement with Childline - I ran the Dream Run at the Mumbai Marathon two years ago, to raise funds for Childline. I can proudly claim that I managed to raise a respectable amount that far exceeded the standard contribution. This was possible because Shikha, who works with Childline, was a great motivator, who pushed me into pushing myself. It was a fantastic experience, and I am glad I participated.I got to know more about Childline's activities through Shikha and other social workers, and pledged my whole hearted support to it.Well, the next Mumbai marathon is upon us, and though I won't be running, I'm planning to help out regardless.Starting with the 10th September initiative.The date 10 9 8 also happens to be the helpline number for children in distress.Several interesting initiatives are being planned around it. For more info, visit the Childline website. And if you too feel strongly about the Anchorage ruling, make sure your voice is heard. Because children need us. Desperately. And paedophiles must be punished. MUST!!

QueerZaadi March

I wish I could have joined the QueerZaadi March at Chowpatty this saturday. After India's Union Health Minister Ambumani Ramadoss pushed for the scrapping of the draconian Section 377 of the IPC, it has given the Gay community in India a tremendous boost. Such a show of solidarity (the slated march) would not have been possible even two years ago, when Gays in the city were faced with constant threats, especially from corrupt cops who never failed to remind them of the law. Vulnerable and defenceless, Gays were reduced to either suppressing their inclinations or going about their lives in a clandestine manner, wracked with fear and guilt. My only regretabout the planned march is the use of the word 'Queer' since it has inbuilt implications. It suggests that Gays are odd, peculiar, bent or somehow not 'normal'. If the organisers of the march had thought about this aspect, perhaps they might have called it something else.
I also hate columnists\journos who write pro-Gay pieces captioned 'Some of my best friends are gay." It is akin to saying "Some of my best friends are dogs." It reeks of condescension and a patronising attitude, even if the intentions are wonderful. Why single out Gays for such special treatment? Do we also say, " Some of my best friends are Dalit\Muslim\Hindus"? Or has the time come to declare ones position in such a brazen way? If so, how awful. Well.... here's wishing all the very best to the March for Sexual Freedoms on Saturday .

when plants die

Strange. I didn't think I would feel this devastated when the recent cyclonic weather in Mumbai destroyed two of my favourite plants.... took them away. One was a delicate bamboo that i had nurtured over four years. It was my favourite. Why? Because it was so undemanding... it never sulked, nor did it ask for any special treatment. Quite unlike my frangipani, which was moody, even downright rude! It had flowered just once.... and most grudgingly. I had greeted the fragrant blossoms with whoops of delight.And showed them off to indifferent visitors like they were my grand children. That was it. Perhaps embarrassed by all the attention, the frangipani had withdrawn into a sullen refusal to produce more blooms. Despite the petulance, I loved its graceful branches and bright green leaves. I even loved its bare phases when the branches resembled amputated limbs.Now that's gone , too. The cruel fury of monsoon winds blew both these beauties away. And suddenly I was left with the abandoned ferns that had stubbornly stayed on. I stare at them and feel nothing. I continue to mourn the ones that have gone. I wonder whether they will miss me as much as I am missing them.
People can be divided into Plant Persons and Non-plant persons. You now know which category I fit into.The best plants are the ones that someone presents you. Someone who understands.And it's always interesting to see which plant that person picks. My friend Punita , who runs a charming art gallery called Hacienda, always knows. The loveliest plants in my small collection have come from her. I don't know how to break the news that the two I lost were also given by her. She may have forgotten. But I haven't. For, to gift a plant, is to gift life. It is a responsibility. And an honour. I feel like I have let Punita down. I hope she forgives me...