Sunday, August 10, 2008

Kinng is actually a joker

It's a con job. Or... a corny job. Clumsy, clunky,pointless and boring.This is what happens when people like Bamzee get a bit too big for their boots and try to fool the public. Rubbish is rubbish. The Sikh angle is dishonest and manipulative. These guys are a bunch of losers wearing stiched, satin turbans - the kind worn by streetside magicians. Completely ridiculous and an insult to the community.Red Hot Akshay at size zero is a shadow of his former hunky self. No wonder his performance lacks oomph and energy. As for the anaemic Katrina Kaif with her butter -won't- melt in -her -mouth, put -on sweetness, she is as lifeless as the Sphinx.Between the two of them, the heat they generate wouldn't light a bulb (if you are looking for a furnace, check out Mallika Sherawat in 'Pagli or Ugli' ). 'Singh is Kinng' is a total dud, and I am amazed some critics gave it a 3-star rating. It makes me wonder if there is a herd mentality at work somewhere ( press show ke baad, opinions milaao, joint decisions lo, aur chamcha review likho). It is such a nonsensical effort - what Bamzee was thinking (money!)?Akshay looked yummy only during the Punjab sequences, dressed in colourful mulmul kurtas. Since this is a full on Punjabi film, with a few scattered hindi dialogues, subtitles would have helped. Even though there is nothing to understand or follow - no plot, no story.Kirron Kher looked sooooo awful, one had to shut ones eyes and hope she'd go away. Sonu Sood didn't get Lucky , even if his name was Lucky in the film.Australia's Gold Coast looked gorgeous and far sexier than Kaif and Dhupia put together. Akki can't dance, saala! What and who does that leave? Ranvir Sheorey??? Snoop Dogg?? Oh.... how could I forget the chicken in the opening scene delivering what is by far the most energetic and convincing performance in this turkey of a film. Bilkul bekaar.Save money. Save time. Save the chicken.

24 comments:

Al Walling said...

and finally i'm the first to comment........
:)
uhm......
the chicken stole the spotlight.....
shabashhh!!

mistercrowley said...

Hehe. Y'know what? I'd probably pay to go watch the chicken, for what it's worth.

Maddy said...

For the past few weeks I was reading your blog.
In the last two posts you left your trade mark “its Shoba de’s”. I read your columns in THE HINDU back in late 80’s (if I am not wrong). With the same vigor you are writing even today.

Thanks for Saving my time, my money and my Channa masala ( I’m a Veggie)lol!!

*Aham* said...

subah ka ads i read in paper, it says "Super Hit" for singh is king. My friend called up and said. "arrey kya bolta hai, paper mein SuperHit likha hai". Yes, (some)Indians are fools, they cant make out the difference between gimmick and real.

What surpised me was your observation Kirron Kher looking aweful. She usually looks cool and hip. But pata nahi kher family is going through SadeSatti or something. Sikander Dooba, Kirron Flop, Anupam busy playing teacher...

Critics Milli bhagat. yes it is. I agree.

Altaf said...

Hey Shobhaa,

Your analysis is spot on (as usual).
Just goes to show how easily misled our public is with some clever marketing & hype.
What is more scarier is how a certain section of the media propogates such trash. All in all a total faltoo flick (and that's being kind).

Keep smiling,

:) Altaf

[-V-] said...

thank you for saving my time n money mam.

Kris Bass said...

I watched the latest episode of the CNN IBN entertainment review show hosted by Rajeev Masand where he reviewed Singh is Kinng. The show which is called 'Now Showing' just won the best show in some awards function recently. Even though he blasted the movie, he still gave a two stars (out of five). I don't understand that either.

onKIA said...

M'am De',

It gives a great sense of relief to read your comment and equal concern of how and what the way a film is being promoted.

Mr.Bazmee the director - how influenced you can get with the Producer and the Half Producer the lead talent is a matter of introspection.

The Mathematics of Distributors International collections may also influence them to get into the driver's seat.

Too many cooks spoil the broth?

Vinod Agarwal - Comments with vested interests (Aspiring Producer)

rain girl said...

mam, so agree! i was dragged to watch the movie n it was an insult to my intelligent to watch it..
it offended my sensibilities ( i'm a punjabi) n they made me feel like a fool. wth, it was sick..how could kiron kher act in such a movie?

alex paul k said...

n d saying goes King had a record breaking opening

India shining

sanjuayyar said...

i dont know how well you've taken to my reply to your earlier post, but the fact is that despite all the ills we've managed an olympic gold. in an individual evet. yes, thats right.

as far as singh is kinng goes, it is a complete no-brainer. couldnt have agreed more. whats funnier is that nikhat kazmi and mayank shekhar both gave 3 stars to the film. which means, both need some serious counselling. besides some education on good cinema, that is.

Girish said...

Why is it that we make sweeping statements, yes all of us have our opinions. But, shouldn't we also highlight the positives as well, "this movie will appeal to a large section of the population, the marketing & promotions for the movie was mind blowing (they burnt money intelligently, used 08.08.08 effectively, etc)".
Why do we as a country always focus only on the negatives.
Same goes with the Indian olympics team, we run down our athletes and write them off even before the games have started (yes, the teams in the past have not performed, but that does not mean this team will not). In India the facilities are soo pathetic, that its difficult to get good gear or equipment even if you have the money for it (its just not available or there is too much red tape to source it).

I hope to see a post on how Singhh is really the king, biggest ever 'hindi film' 1st weekend grosser, biggest overseas 1st weekend grosser (yes, bigger than a SRK movie!!), and in all likelihood the second weekend (again a long one) will be good.

freeself said...

Just came to know today, that you have a blog too ! Got a lot of catching up to do..:-)
The trailers of the movie looked so unpromising that I didn't dare go watch it ! Was expecting a review such as yours. Surprisingly, the movie is a super duper hit !! Wonder what it says about the Indian audience really...

bitskhiladi said...

i totally agree with "girish"....why is it that v r bent upon ridiculing a movie which has lived upto its hype and giving us 2 hour entertainment.....

giving so many negative comments sounds really wierd....d movie is a "BRAINLESS COMEDY" and is a perfect entertainer.........

maybe ur analysis for dis movie is over exaggerated or too much "BRAINY".....

I REALLY DOUBT if this review has come straight from ur heart....in that case i m really anxious to read ur take on OSO.....

NO OFFENCE MEANT....god bless u ....n may u keep writing more wonderful reader-friendly books and not reviews for BRAINLESS yet ENTERTAINING comedies......

bitskhiladi said...

also, i M CURIOUS to know another thing.....what's d purpose behind such a rude review???

is it to stress that singh is kinng is a bad movie or does it try to focus on d debate that S.R.K is "so called" king???

every1 has an individual opinion...so i conclude by puttin forward mine- HAIL THE NEW KINNG.......who has set d box office on fire and is a role model to many youngsters like me......

god bless u ma'am.........

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Shobhaa De said...

guys.... u really over reacted to this post, huh?? Howcome??

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

I know!! People get their knickers in a knot over the silliest of things. I mean anyone who spends money and time to watch a movie is entitled to his/her opinion. It's called customer feedback!! Plus insert your own free speech speech here.



p.s. Lol at the Katrina Kaif-Sphinx comparison!!

Girish said...

Shobhaa, it all means that your blog is working and people are reacting to it!!

rekha said...

AMEN! Someone finally said it! Bless you... what the crap was this Singh is King? Didn't it remind you of that movie Jo Bole So Nihaal with Sunny baba from a fortnight ago? Even that was a bit more entertaining than this crap. And, someone please tell me who declares these movies hits or flops? That person needs to be fired and fired again a hundred times over. Uff what a time waste that was.

bitskhiladi said...

good question i must say....as far as my sixth sense and common sense says its d "aam junta" which decides whether the film is a hit or a flop....but here, the film is neither a hit or a flop...infact it has turned out to b a huge blockbuster after having surpassed Om S hanti Om and Jodhaa Akbar records.....

NO OFFENCE MEANT...

Vishal kumar said...

wat ever was it........ i love to watch him...... and atleast with her(katrina......) its a awesome pair to watch...... i watched movie bcoz of akky, katrina, and the class actor ,just like nashirudin shah and mid 70's actor , ranvir shorey.......
ui heard u r a gud writer but cant find anything that makes u eligible to write in The Hindu.........

hope this helps u and let u improve ur writing.... n give u strength to understand things better,,,,,,,,..........

:-)

but v live in democracy n every one has a write to say....///

carry on....

next movie is coming chandani chawk to china........

dont watch it......
u dont desrve to .......

;-)

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