Friday, June 6, 2008

sex or the city

Yup. It has indeed come to that. One has to pick. Can't have both! If you live in the city, especially Mumbai, there is no time for sex. Simple! Especially during the monsoons. The weather outside is seriously wretched.... but I love it! It's one of those hard to explain Mumbai quirks ( if you love Mumbai, you must love the monsoon). THE movie to see in desperately awful weather like this is 'Sex and the City' , which should be retitled 'Sex in the City', since there is no way sex can happen in the suburbs, given the present commute time, and that's before the flooding of tracks starts and all our worthy Municipal stalwarts act like they have no previous knowledge or experience of heavy rains disrupting life in our metropolis! 'What?? Have the trains been cancelled?? What? What? There is knee deep water everywhere? Oh... better to declare a holiday and stay home for a week. What to do? We are not knowing when rain is coming or going jor jor se.... how it is our fault? We are not bhagwan. You peoples are unnecessarily blaming... take umbrella and go. Don't trouble again with all this faltu talk." Get the picture?
I'm definitely getting the picture. Two pictures, actually. Watching 'Sex...." tomorrow and 'Sarkar Raj' on sunday. Three Bachchans for the price of one ticket. Let's hope Big Mouth Ramu is more in control this time. Or else, it will be 'chhutti buddy", and then where will the man go?
Strange thing about Ramu. He manages to hook amazing girls. Ramu!!! You know what I mean? Urmilla was but one of them. Now here's a thoroughly modern Millie, who knows her onions and chops them into her batata poha . What was she doing with Ramu?? Let's not ask. I shudder to think. On the other hand,look what happened when she waltzed away - she is still waltzing, but solo and minus any great roles. I guess being Ramu's woman has its advantages - but really, would any talented, beautiful girl want them that bad?
I am about to light a really special aroma candle ( bought from Paradise Studio, one of the world's most aesthetic lifestyle stores. And it is in Colombo). Why? The rains have that effect on me. Others eat bhajiyas and bhuttas, and talk rubbish about enjoying cups of steaming ginger tea (note: their tea is always steaming). I like listening to opera and sipping Chablis (just made that up. For effect). Seriously, I am concerned about the rain. It is way too early and way too heavy. And we definitely don't want a repeat of the old nightmare. If the city fathers remain indifferent this year, let's drag them out of their dry and comfy offices for a taste of the real thing. Hands up, if you want to join me...


anand said...

I never found rains romantic, neither have a found a person like me who hates rains.
Your Pune connection was spilled all over every newspaper.
Good going and keep up the posts coming.

dayanand said...

Good to see you back so quick.
Your writing gets more and more interesting but at times can be shrewd and make way for sarcastic humour.

shweta said...

hey i hav alwaz liked the way u write.........keep posting
and for that rain drive my hands are alwaz up.......being a mumbaite

vedika said...

Ahh..just couldn't refrain myself from posting a comment on one of my fav topics"SEX"'s occupied larger than life picture in our lives since ages and though I must second your thoughts on the retitlement of Sex and the city as in "Sex in the city" you how appropriate it sounds when it comes to making out amidst the bustling lives in cities like Delhi and Mumbai. Rather termed now as a "Quickie in the city" my hub inquired if I was game for a quickie..I was like uh excuse me and then I realized that's the new name of the ...true yet alarming..hmm!
Enjoying every bit of your posts..Pls keep chippin in..

sanjuayyar said...

Rains can be very romantic. Provided you are in the Nilgiris or Ooty or someplace sane.
Not in Mumbai. And definitely not when you live in the suburbs. Forget sex, the entire so-called municipal machinery goes impotent.
What does the aam aadmi do. Of course, enjoy his bhajiya and steaming cutting chai in ganda glass.

Shobhaa De said...

i enjoyed reading about the quickie in the city!

*Aham* said...

though the busiest, we are the happiest.

{ohh no! this is not about the escapist "applaud the resilience of bombayites" attitude.}

and it is so in all aspects which includes sex. i quite disagree with the quickie bit. i think bombayites are great lovemakers, they dont get time to spend with their spouses, they make time available and when they do, they are too devoted and manier times kinky.

just walk deep into borivalli national park on a sunday, and you would find people behind bushes daring the serpants to do a adam-eve thingy with them.

twinks too, get an opportunity, be it the regular weekend gay bombay parties, or the occassional "im homealone" hints, gays, lesbians, kink ... bombaites "do it" well, and very beautifully and arousingly. bombayites are far from being sex starved.

this probably is the only place where people have the time for nothing, and also have the time for everything.


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